Roommates

How to get one and how to keep one!

When you arrive at Chapman, you will have to make the typical adjustments to your lifestyle to accommodate living with your roommate, just like everyone else. The following are issues that should be discussed with your roommate, whether or not you know the person well:

SMOKING: Residence Life rules prohibit students and guests from smoking in the residence halls and apartments. Smoking is allowed outside of set boundaries around each building. Despite this the smell of smoke on you or your roommate can be offensive. Talk to one another about this if it becomes an issue.

ALCOHOL: The storage or consumption of alcohol is against rules within the residence halls unless each of the residents are 21 years of age or more. Resident Advisors are required to confront the use of alcohol on campus and are also required to confront "drunk" or inebriated underage people whom have been drinking off-campus but are returning to their rooms. It is still necessary to consider talking to your roommate if the use or storage of alcohol is a problem.

DRUGS: the possession, sale, manufacture and/or distribution of any controlled substance without a valid prescription is illegal as defined by various laws. Residents involved in such illegal activities may be arrested and are subject to Housing sanctions and/or other legal action.

"NIGHT" OR "MORNING" PEOPLE: The times that roommates retire for the night and wake up in the morning can become a source of tension and difficulty. It is imperative that each roommates' rights and needs are respected and accommodated.

MUSIC: The type, style and volume of music are also things to consider and discuss. Music seldom only affects the listener.

VISITATION / GUESTS: The guests you or your roommate invite to visit (particularly those of the opposite sex and/or a significant other) and the duration and frequency of visits needs to be discussed. All visitors must be acceptable to all roommates at all times.

STUDY HABITS: When and where do you do your optimal studying? Do you need the television or radio on or off? Does it bother you if other people are in the room? These questions need to be discussed.

BATHROOM SCHEDULE: Do you prefer to shower in the morning, evening, or late at night? How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? Do you use devices that make excessive noise, such as a hair dryer or electric razor? These issues should be addressed to establish an agreeable bathroom schedule and living situation.

CLEANLINESS: Does a cluttered room make you feel uneasy? Do you need to have a clean room before you feel that you can be productive? Do you have to wait until Health/Safety Inspections to feel motivated enough to clean? Your and your roommates cleanliness habits have a tremendous effect on yourself and your roommate(s).

COMMON PROPERTY: Would it disturb you to find out that one of your roommates was listening to your music, watching your TV, using your computer? Does it bother you when someone else wears or borrows your clothing with or without your permission? Chances are that your roommate(s) might or might not feel the same way.

Other pieces of advice...

Don't be disappointed if you and your roommate are not going to be best friends. Casual, mutually respectful relationships can provide you with a satisfying, secure "home base" as you navigate the foreign waters of college life. Let these relationships develop naturally, without expecting that you and your roommate will always be doing things together.

Establish house rules. As soon as possible, get together over a meal or whatever to plan for peaceful, responsible coexistence. Now is the time to let your roomie know your sleeping habits, your noise tolerance capacity, your feelings about people borrowing your personal items without asking, and whether you're a slob or a neat freak.

Create roommate rituals. Give yourselves a chance to get to know each other better by establishing regular roommate get-togethers: going out to get a sandwich once a week, taking in a movie once a month, watching a favorite TV show, or celebrating each other's birthdays.

Displays of common courtesy and empathy are the basis of successful roommate relationships. Be sensitive to how your roommate is feeling. Offer some encouraging words when your roommate is anxious about their big tests or term papers and show them you care.

Sometimes roommate situations become unbearable, even if you've tried to make it work. Your room must be a place where you can find relative peace and harmony. Toughing it out in an unhealthy roommate environment will adversely affect other aspects of your residence life. Ask your Residence Advisor for help after it seems that you have done everything in your power to amend the situation. If this does not work, talk to the Office of Housing and Residence Life for help and possibly find a better living arrangement.